Actually I just wanted to be happy..but it is not easy..
Pretending to smile in front of everyone even though not happy..
Thinking about what others people judge me for what I've done..
Wondering whether there is anyone who really care about me..
Reconsidering whether what I'm doing now is right or wrong..
Worrying if I've nobody to turn to when I'm upset..
Terrifying with the coming final exams..
Waiting for my savior to rescue me..
After all, searching for happiness is not an easy route..
I hope there will be at least someone to accompany me in my journey..
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Just finished my microbiology test yesterday..All also dunno how to do..T.T..Who will remember all the temperature and the time for the microbes to grow~~!!If there were thousand of microbes..Means I have to memorize all?Felt really frustrated with this semester..All subjects seem so hard to get good results..Why university's exams would be like this?It is all depend on the lecturers..What they like,they will put in the paper,even though not in the notes..So,what the use of studying the notes?..Useless and waste time..Study and not study have no different..University's life is really not as easy as what I think..Haiz..
Monday, January 25, 2010
Recently so busy with many things..Especially with Xin Chun things..Sometimes feel so stressed about it but dont know can talk to who..Being an important person in a group is really not an easy job..Everybody's feeling I have to take care of..Even about their tasks,I dare not to interrupt or take over..I just let them run their groups..I respect them as a leader,but sometimes I even doubt myself..Do they really give the same respect to me also..Many things I did not mention, doesnt mean that I dont know and dont care..In addition,even a very small mistake will be a big issue..I admit I really did something wrong but please,who haven did anything wrong before..Can we just move on?Thinking of sharing with seniors or friends,but scared will bcome another HOT issue..I really scared I will explode 1 day..Just letting out all my feelings just like that..Sometimes,I felt like I really Suck!!!Trying to be nice,friendly and easy-going..Or I have to be serious and fierce all the time..?I really confuse..I wanted to do the best I can..I really trying..But is there really anyone care about it?Or I just an useless puppet?When I give encouragements to others..I also need the same encouragement too..Who really know that?I really cant fall asleep..Really..Really..Doubting my ability..doubting my everythg..By the way,who cares?!!!